I really like to think. I can be rightfully accused of overthinking many things. All through school, I was told that I made things too hard for myself. Just do it this way…but….in my head, I’d be asking why? Why this way?
I can also remember, that as a little girl, I would lie (or is it lay?) in the back yard and spend a lot of time looking up at the sky, thinking. The thought I remember the most was, “If God made everything, then who made God?” Did you ever ask yourself that?
Now, many years later, I still love to think and ask God questions. I looked up THINK in the dictionary. One of the definitions is: to imagine or understand something or the possibility of something.
Doesn’t that sound wonderful? To imagine or understand something or the possibility of something.
Recently, there has been a lot of talk in my circle of friends about dreaming big. Well, thinking I knew how to do but imagine my surprise when I realized that I had forgotten how to dream! There are lots of reasons for this sad truth that I won’t go into on the worldwide web. Let’s just leave it at this – I stopped dreaming because of fear.
For heaven’s sake I started this blog two years ago because I realized how much fear had overtaken my life. So much healing has happened since I began this journey. And, just like my loving Father God, He stirs my heart to want more and then He continues to show me areas where healing is needed and gives me courage to move forward.
He could heal me with a thought, but instead He invites me to partner with Him in the healing that I so desperately want. To partner with Him, for me – means, stepping out and trusting. In the area of dreaming, it means to go beyond thinking and cross over into dreaming. For me to dream again, means I must dismantle self-protective barriers that I had erected and begin to hope and feel. I don’t put my hope in my dream. That’s false hope. I put my hope in the One who maybe, just maybe, gave me that dream.
Psalm 37:4 in the Amplified Bible says it this way, “Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He will give you the desires and secret petitions of your heart.” What if those dreams and desires in my heart were from Him to start with? When I become more consumed with Him and not the ‘thing’ then I begin to live my life with the One that matters most.
I’ve had one dream, and only one, since 1999. Wow, what a big dreamer – right?!? Like the Scripture says, it really was a secret petition of my heart! This dream was so impossible that in the natural, there was simply no way I could make it happen. It was beyond me in every way. So, I prayed and just lived my life. If God was the One who put that dream in my heart, as in Psalm 37:4, then as I delighted in Him, it was up to Him to make it happen. I actually learned to rest in that truth through all the ups and downs that came with the waiting.
Now, 15 years later, I am actually living in that dream. It isn’t fully here, but I am in it!
But, I had only one dream. While I could feel smug about my one dream coming true, instead, I am painfully aware that I have allowed other dreams to be silenced because of fear.
So, now I am combining thinking with dreaming and the possibilities are endless!
It’s not up to me anyway. I just trust, partner and live my life without my self-protective barriers.
PS…if you would like to read a great book on resurrecting your own dreams, my friend Byron Easterling wrote a book about this very subject. It is called, “Dream Big Dream Often” and can be purchased on Graham Cooke’s site: http://BrilliantBookhouse.com. And, I guess I’ll just tell you that my 15 year old dream is actually working with Byron. Check out his website at http://bhhinc.org to see part of my dream coming true!