Monthly Archives: June 2013

The Transforming Power of Identity and Community…Part 2


From my previous post, the question arises – How DID David and I heal up so much? It’s kind of like the chicken and the egg.  Which came first?  Identity or Community?  I mean, seriously, I have known, and lived out, my identity pretty darn well over the last several years.  But, I lived it out in a state of isolation.

For me, the pain I had experienced, created the strong pull to live an isolated life.  Hurt has a way of clouding our vision.  I forgot who I was in a corporate sense; therefore, my cave became more appealing.  I’m probably no different from anyone else, in that, I could still be “me” with a select few.  Therefore, I thought I was ‘fine’.  However, our desire for Community was being revived.  Healing brings your spirit into focus.

What you focus on – you empower.  For all these years we focused on what we were not, in a corporate sense – therefore, we allowed THAT to be the defining power over our lives.  Comparing oneself to others is deadly to your spirit.  You’ll never measure up, because other people are not the standard by which to measure!

Instead!!! And I do so love that word – INSTEAD – we came into agreement with Heaven’s perspective that we are accepted, loved and have things to offer.  That isn’t pride!  It is truth.  By coming into agreement with that truth, it changed our focus, in a corporate sense.  Then THAT became the defining power over our lives.  But, and I can’t say that enough – for us – it was in community, not isolation that this really began to bring accelerated healing.

So, while we were being transformed yet again, we trusted people in spite of the fact that these people were – well – people.  We ended up trusting God the Father more than people and found that this is a brilliant idea.  God, the Keeper of Our Hearts is more than capable of meeting the needs of each one of us.

If we get wounded, He knew that ahead of time and made provision within His own heart to heal us.  Each Person in the Trinity has a personality and is accessible to us at any point!  It’s like running with the Ultimate Tribe where we can find healing, joy, strength, hope, etc.  Hebrews 4:15-16 says,  For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have One who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet He did not sin.  Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.”

If we are soaring with joy, They smile at our increasing trust level. And in those moments, we can love other people well.  You know – those who prefer the isolation of their own caves.  By knowing the acceptance that comes from our true identity, we no longer live in fear of being known because Father God knows us and loves us! And when you know who you really are, the security that comes from that strengthens you in your everyday life in community.

Oh, by the way – that also means seeing Father God in His true identity – as approachable, loving, kind, generous, full of joy, etc.  But that will be another blog post.

Maybe it’s just that we are older, wiser and have more insurance, Towanda.  But the transformation in both David and me, over this last year, has brought us out into the open.  We know the joy of being healed by the Ones who love us most – The Trinity!



So much change has happened in our lives since I started this blog, just one year ago!  Happy Anniversary to me!  We must always look forward and live present/future.  Living present/past is usually full of baggage and pain.  Full of “I can’t….because….”  But there are times we need to look back, just for a moment.  In doing so, we can see just how far we’ve come!  Identity and Community were our key change agents, but I’ll get to that later, so keep reading!

Last year, when I started this blog I was stunned to see how much I lived in fear of people.  The thought of being seen, known or even noticed sent me into a panic.  I lived on the fringes of everything and everyone.  Close enough so that you could see me, but I knew there was a wide, protective barrier between you and my heart.  Thank God there were a handful of people who I did feel very safe with!!!! This last year has been a year of increase in so many areas.  One being an increase in my heart and therefore relationships!

I am no longer afraid of being seen, known or noticed!  Visibility, which has typically been the equivalent of having a red bulls-eye painted on my heart isn’t an issue any more.  Will wounds still happen?  Yes, but they won’t derail me, as in previous episodes.  Why, you ask?  Because of Identity and Community.  Keep reading…

Over this last year, David and I both have stopped living isolated lives.  David found his Tribe through the Indianapolis School of Supernatural Ministry.  There, he learned the beauty of who he truly is.  The man I’ve always known, and loved, was rarely was known by anyone else. David got introduced to his true identity, through this community, and then got absorbed, immersed, captivated and captured by the love of God and came out on the other side a changed man!

I had a few close friends.  But, as for community, David and I were in community but not really in it to win it, so to speak.  However, we thought we were!  We simply didn’t realize how we lived it out.  It is just so easy to not connect beyond the surface with people.  We live fast-paced lives full of all sorts of obligation and commitments.  This is not a judgment but more like a statement on how we lived our lives.  And, I’m taking a risk here – I think people may like it that way.  The relative safety of our busyness keeps us at arm’s length from the gift of deeper friendships. 

That kind of friendship doesn’t happen without a lot risk, time and effort.  Those were three commodities that were easy to overlook in our busy lives.  

I’m pretty sure that I am not the only one who has struggled with the fear of being known.  Through very real and painful situations that occurred in my life the fear of being known was valid.  Why would I want to be seen?  To be seen, as I said earlier, got me shot at.  It was safer to live in a cave of isolation.  Be nice, smile, come say hello and run like the dickens when anyone approached me for anything more than a polite nod.

I will post part 2 later.  That will share more about the transforming power of Identity and Community.